The Jukebox at The Diner Volume Three: "The Funk" Part Five - Jive Talkin'
"Jive Talkin'" by The Bee Gees
Previously on The Jukebox at The Diner Volume Three…
During the lunch rush, if you’d call it a rush, a few of the customers recognized Penny, JePo, Samantha, and Charlie from the Gummy Bear Crucifix show at Clayton’s on South Padre Island. The video had a ton of views, along with the rehearsal show at the Yacht Club, so after Penny and JePo had put out all the orders, they went out to the stage deck. They hadn’t used it since before they left for Texas, but everything was in good shape, so Penny set up a mic and a chair and brought out her guitar. There was about 30 minutes left before the bus left, and it was a nice day. There were only a few customers inside, and they all moved out to the picnic tables with the rest of the travelers when they saw Penny setting up.
“Hi everyone, I’m Penny, welcome to Charlie’s Corner. If you don’t recognize him because he’s not in a Foghorn Leghorn costume, that’s Charlie right there, my Dad. You may recognize the sex pot sitting next to him, that’s my bass player and soul mom, Samantha. I’m gonna play a song for them right now. It’s not punk or funk. We’ve been listening to a lot of vintage funk around here lately, especially on Tuesdays since we’re open at night now that there’s a bus that comes from Spokane, so, if it’s an early Tuesday morning in Spokane, jump on the bus, it’s awesome here at night, we light up the treeline behind us, and there’s a very pretty walk along the back as well. It’s kind of our little tribute to The House on The Rock and The Palace of Depression if you’ve ever heard of those places. Dad, Soul Mom, this is for you.
This song choice is inspired by the fact that trailer walls ain’t much better than the paper ones in cheap motels.”
Penny began strumming a bit until she knew Charlie recognized it. As she was closing out the song she slowed it way down.
It ain't the road that kills you, baby,
(then 4 bars of a metronome tap on the guitar)
It's not the all-night calls;
(then 4 bars of a metronome tap on the guitar)
It ain't the road that kills you, baby,
(then 4 bars of a metronome tap on the guitar)
It's just the paper walls
As she finished, the crowd applauded. Then Samantha came up on stage and leaned into the mic.
“I WAS being quiet. I’ll get you some noise-canceling headphones.”
Then she turned on her heels and went back inside the diner to whoops and hollering.
As the bus rolled away a little later, Charlie came around the corner of the diner with the basketball. Penny was just locking up the sound system and putting the cover back over it and smiled.
“Loser washes the cars.”
“You win, Joey and I wash them. I wish, you and the girls wash them.” -Charlie
Penny smiled. “I missed out on the chainsaw dance, you might have motivated me more than you should have.”
“Fuck.” -Charlie
“Let’s do this old man.” -Penny
A few minutes later, everyone was gathered in the back.
Charlie, standing by the hood of his 65 F-250, aka Flo, passed the ball to Penny.
“Ladies First.” -Charlie
Penny held the ball for a moment. “I don’t even have to trash talk you. Bumblebee? Trash talk track number one please.” Then Penny passed the ball back to Charlie without a bounce as the outdoor jukebox speaker crackled.
“Age before beauty old man.”
“Uh-huh.” -Charlie, draining a shot from the front bumper of Flo.
Penny’s first shot was a little too hard and bounced off the backboard but hit the rim after a little too hard and rang out.
Sheriff Joey Strongbull smiled.
Deputy Bella Price faked a frown.
He’d already seen her in a bikini top at the falls on one of their “rounds” to check on the falls.
Charlie noticed JePo had her phone out.
“Did you Facetime Mouse?”
JePo nodded.
“Good.” -Charlie, as he walked towards JePo, who moved, so he could stand in the frame of the back door. A no backboard side shot. His weakest shot. It hit the inside of the rim softly and fell through the net.
Penny’s did not.
“I’m sorry girls.”
That’s when Charlie took about a forty-foot walk into the parking lot.
It was honestly the most Kawhi shot ever. Afterward, they all watched the video and counted 4 bounces about the rim before it fell, off to the side.
Penny finally had the advantage.
She took the same shot that Charlie just took. That earned her her first letter.
Because she’d made the shot Charlie just missed, it was still her shot. She waited right where she’d shot the last one, and did it again. Nothing but net.
Charlie’s shot bounced off the front of the rim.
Game tied.
Just a couple of H.O.’s
Penny took the next shot from about 20 feet to the side of the rim away from the diner. A miss would probably bounce into the kitchen, which it did. It was an airball.
That gave Charlie a chance to regain control.
He called time and ran into the diner and dropped a silver dime into the jukebox, then came jogging back out and boogied his way to the spot Penny missed from, and drained it.
H.O.R (Charlie) to H.O (Penny) if you’re keeping score.
That forced Penny to make the shot or be on the brink of washing 2 Ford trucks, 2 Ford police cruisers, a Shelby, A Cosworth 500, and her own Raptor as well as the 55 Chevy.
Charlie Jones had found his groove.
“Who is this!” -Samantha
“Who is Sonny Cleveland!” -Charlie, answering like was on Jeopardy, and still dancing.
Penny’s shot stuck between the rim and the backboard. Joey jumped up and fetched it and passed it back to Penny.
Charlie nodded that was ok. Penny shot again and made it, but the next shot Charlie took… it just made everyone shake their head. He bounced it hard off the ground from the front of his truck and it went in.
Penny missed, but not by much. Elimination shot. Charlie just walked up to the free throw line, then turned around and tossed it backward over his head. Nothing but net. Today was about to be Charlie Jone’s day. He did a little Chappie Shuffle.
Penny’s shot bounced off the rim.
Charlie didn’t celebrate, he just walked up and hugged his daughter. “Good game Two-Bits. I’m not gonna trash talk you because Joey and I are going to enjoy the view from a couple of beach chairs with a cooler between us after lunch tomorrow.”
“Damn. I already burned Car Wash this morning, you’re gonna have to think of something else for the soundtrack.” -Penny, smiling.